BEWARE: SPOILERS. SPOILERS. SPOILERS.
Seriously, if you don’t want perhaps the biggest OMG, game-changing moment in Game of Thrones since Ned Stark lost his head way back in season one spoiled, look away NOW.
1. Joffrey is dead. ALL HAIL THE KINGSLAYER (whoever that is…)
Two episodes in and Game of Thrones has claimed its first (but certainly not last) death of the season. The character we all love to hate has finally been slain. The bastard is dead. Jack Gleeson acted his socks off in this scene, but Lena Headey was simply sublime as she screamed “my son”. Joffrey pointed the finger of blame at Tyrion before his final breath but did the Imp really slay his kin? And if not, who did? Sansa? Tywin? Margaery? Olenna? And who will take his place upon the Iron Throne?
2. The Purple Wedding
The fan-dubbed ‘Purple Wedding’ was glorious to behold onscreen and it showed that both the good and the bad guys get their comeuppance eventually. No one is safe. I imagine Joffrey’s death came as a massive shock to everyone that hadn’t read the books previously, but it was a long time coming. The overall narrative thread (around 30 minutes of the episode) was fantastic and once more showed how the budget for the show has been increased. Money well spent, in my opinion.
3. Bran wargs into a tree
Season one and two Bran is boring. Season three Bran kind of becomes a little interesting. Season four Bran looks set to become interesting (especially if they play his story out from A Dance With Dragons). The scene of Bran, as Summer, stalking a deer was gorgeously shot and executed, as was the montage of clips as Bran warged into the heart tree. Anyone else see Dany’s vision of the snowy Iron Throne thrown in there? And the dragons soaring over the Capital? Perhaps a hint at the eventual outcome of the show…
4. The Queen of Snark is shot down.
The entire wedding was a tense affair. After the Red Wedding of season three everyone was on tenterhooks, expecting more bloodshed. Comic relief came from these two particular scenes for me. Firstly (my new favourite character) Oberyn (who flirted with Loras, before he himself shot Jaime down… there was just too much happening in this episode to comment on!) exchanged pleasantries with Tywin and Cersei…
5. Olenna is funny again
And Olenna comforted Sansa, before foreshadowing the events of the episodes close. I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again. Olenna is a fantastic addition to the ever-expanding cast, and long may she last. Seriously George RR Martin – DON’T KILL OLENNA.
6. Brienne and Jaime, sitting in a tree…
Who would’ve thought Brienne would take a fancy to Jaime? In truth I would have expected it to be the other way around, but imagine Cersei’s face if they ever did hook up! Part of me wants them too, and part of me doesn’t. I’ll leave this one to play out for a while before I make my decisions.
7. The dwarves
Probably intended as more comic relief, Joffrey’s latest (and soon to be last) stunt left a sour taste in many a mouth. He was simply taking the piss out of the five dwarves and made Sansa relive her brother’s death once more. I did however love Margaery stepping in to try and relief the every growing tension between Tyrion and Joffrey, and Varys getting hit on the head by one of the performers. A little scene, but comedy gold.
8. Melisandre burns
Melisandre burned some poor souls once more, giving viewers a glorious shot of the three pyres, but has everyone forgotten that when we saw them last the Onion Knight had recently freed Gendry? King Stannis doesn’t seem to care. But how uncomfortable was that meal scene?! Dining with the wife and the mistress, Stannis? AWKS.
9. Tyrian sends Shae away
Peter Dinklage’s scene of the week was when he roared at Shae. Sometimes he gets too much praise lauded upon him, but his acting was fantastic in that short scene. Has Shae really gone? And if she returns will she finally get a new dress after wearing the same outfit for three seasons? Oh, the questions posed this week!
10. Sansa has a chance at freedom
See, the showrunners are clever. No, they didn’t include a scene last week of a random dude from season two just for the hell of it. No! They had plans afoot. Will Sansa flee? I really hope so. She needs to escape the Capital, especially after everything that has befell her of late. And did Dontos know that Joffrey was about to meet his end, or was that just the PERFECT timing? The plot thickens…
11. Theon ACTUALLY gets to do something
Theon Reek actually did something other than scream this week. Ramsay is still a bastard (pun intended) but it was nice to see his father knock him down a peg or two. It’s been long coming.