A Love Lost

Alex Fassam

To make myself somewhat remotely grown up I sign my name Alexander, but most refer to me as Alex. A blogger, retail enthusiast and, for my sins, a student studying at London College of Fashion.In between studying and working you may find me in Oxford street doing what I like to call "extreme shopping".

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Normally I’d be discussing Autumn/Winter trends and whether bow ties are actually cool, but today I think it’s time I write about something a little more close to my heart. I’ve been given a chance, by my editor, to post this article so that my message can be spread as far as possible and in the hope it reaches the right people.

Don’t cry because it ended – cry because it happened. I never really understood these words till now and quite frankly they looked like the words of a tumblr addict.

Recently I’ve had a multitude of heartache and loss from lots of different people in my life. Some were relationships that didn’t quite work out, some were family members and some were people who I’ll always love. Sometimes when you like someone a lot you don’t act the way you should, feelings can really make you a different person and your one regret is that the person you liked so much didn’t see the real you.

Unless you’re a robot incapable of emotions, I’m sure whoever is reading this has had similar experiences.

After spending weeks in my bed and only listening to Will Young’s ‘All time love’ it suddenly dawned on me that in order to move on with your life you need to be brave and to have the courage to say two very important things

Sorry & Thank you.

For someone you’ve lost because of your actions – say sorry. Sorry for the heartache and sorry for the loss. Sorry that you’ve ruined things and sorry for the grief you’ve caused. Be man enough to admit it and you’ll feel better. I do. Admitting you’re wrong can sometimes be incredibly refreshing to your ego, it can shrink it back down to size. A person you’ve forced out of your life and now feel guilty and regretful about will hopefully recognize that you’ve had the courage to say sorry. And mean it. I certainly do.

Secondly say thank you. Thank you for the memories and thank you for making you a better person. With every negative experience you have in your life, a positive can erupt from it. A lesson can be learned and your future can become brighter because you know what went wrong last time, and what you can do to be better in the future. Thank you for the tears, smiles and love. Thank that person for being in your life even if for a short while and leaving it a better place than it was before. You may be enemies, you may not talk anymore and they may have found someone else but thank them for making you stronger.

When you lose someone take some time to feel sad, take some time to be angry but don’t fight it. A lesson I will take with me all throughout life. And once you’ve done all that you have a brand new chapter ready to write. A fresh start as they call it.

So I’ll take the lead shall I?

To all those I’ve hurt, loved, made happy, made stronger and helped find a better love, I say to you sorry and thank you.

All my love

Alex Fassam