Hey, Nice Ass – Twink Objectification

Jake Buck

I’m Jake, I either live on the disgusting part of Cambridge or the disgusting part of London. Sometimes I go to uni at Brunel and sometimes I cry in bed over Disney cartoons. I have a strong attraction to KFC. @JakeBBuck

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Photo by Oliver Ragfelt

I’m walking back to uni after a day in Central London. A car pulls up next to me and I stop for them, smile, and wait for the driver to ask me directions. Instead: “Hey, are you gay? Fancy a quick shag?” I’m frozen. What the hell is this? I walk on without replying. “No, no,” he says, “I’m nice. Just a quick sucky sucky instead?” Oh that’s all? Just a quick blowjob, of course I’ll oblige. Sex is too big a step for me but I’ll gladly have your cock in my mouth. How kind of you, Mr. Stranger.

I’m inside the club with my friends and I get a call, so I go outside to answer. I’m in the smoking area by myself, on the phone and I see a group of guys staring at me. Within the next five minutes it feels like every part of my body is grabbed or squeezed and wolf whistles and shouts of “nice ass,” seem to echo.

I’m on the tube. Reading the Metro, there’s an article about teen girls being preyed on by older men, how it’s becoming a bigger problem and advice on what girls can do in the situation. How they can get help, what numbers to call and so on. My phone goes off and I see a stranger has poked me on Facebook. I read on and there are details about the latest “slut walk” for girls to participate in.

This is not okay. I’m not doing anything to invite this objectification. There’s no one on the lookout for teenage boys being preyed upon because we’re all looking out for girls, and of course we should be. But it’s not just women, that are the target of unwanted sexual advances. Perhaps we should not be focusing our attention purely on the victims, but should examine the predators instead. We should have easier methods to identify and report these types of people, should we not be able to name and shame them?

Every friend I’ve spoken to about this issue has similar stories to tell.  I am sure that most of you reading this have either had it happen to you or someone you know. I suppose some might shake it off and see it as a compliment, but if you just stop to think deep enough, it makes you realise that this complete stranger is thinking about you in the most obscene way. How can acting on this urge, in spite of the willingness of the objectified individual, be okay in our society? What is worse, is that they voice their thoughts and make you feel extremely uncomfortable, confronting you with their unsolicited sexual imagination and desires.

It seems to be a particular type of boy that attracts this predatory attention, the stereotypical ‘twink’. If I were a bodybuilder type or a ‘lad’ then I doubt I’d be getting the same treatment, so why does my style and bodyshape mean I’m down to be perved on? There are so many levels of hypocrisy here, yet somehow it’s fine in the mind of the groper because apparently my style, waist and smile mean I’m up for it. No.

Those that it happens to are largely ignored, with it blamed on the booze with little recognition of the violation that’s taking place when someone physically touches you without permission. That said, it seems that the aggressors are also a type of victim themselves; victims of the club/grindr culture. Clubs regularly promote themselves through the use of flyer boys, typically attractive (though, this is questionable in some cases) twink types to attract a particular crowd. Similar to Hollister’s promotions, they entice you with the promise of eye candy and the teasing lure of potentially getting laid. This simply perpetuates the idea that this type of person is there to be objectified and please with their body…or hands…or mouth…or, well, you get the idea.

Women have feminism and sisterhoods, actively raising awareness of this type of seedy activity in our patriarchal society. This is obviously a great development in terms of individual rights and dignity as they provide a much needed face against the shame and submission that comes with sexual objectification. I just feel that this unilateral focus on women misses the point. Exploitation should be condemned, no matter what gender, race, age, etc. By delving into gay culture, it’s clear there are similarities. While we’re still fighting for equal rights, we should also be uniting against this sort of objectification, rather than splintering within our own minority and promoting inequalities and sexual violation. I’m calling for homoism. Twinks everywhere, join a slut walk.

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