While you read this, imagine Lily Allen’s ‘Fuck You’ playing in the background.
Kevin Swanson. The Christian radio host this week went on a bit of a rant and accused the Disney film Frozen of trying to turn your kids gay. He also claimed that this “evil” act was the work of the “devil”, who apparently infiltrated Disney in 1984, because apparently Swanson has intimate knowledge of the Prince of Evil’s datebook. I don’t know if it’s the assumption that movies have the power to indoctrinate you to such an extent that it can actually turn you homosexual against your will, or the accusation that Disney somehow benefits from turning people gay (because we spend so much more money on cartoons?), or the underlying idea that to be gay is evil which is the most stupid. Never mind the intense logical leap you have to attempt to see any homosexual subtext in this film to begin with, you have to make an even larger one to then assume that this very well-hidden agenda can then somehow magically take hold of your brain and turn you gay without you even noticing it. And if that is the case, you have to wonder: why isn’t everyone gay? Surely if Disney has been turning people gay since 1984 then everyone who has seen The Lion King should be already be a little bit gay? Kevin Swanson: you are an idiot. #gogayforsimba
South Carolina. The South Carolina House of Representatives refused to reinstate funding to two colleges who earlier this year lost their funding because they prescribed gay-themed books. Apparently state law-makers don’t trust students to be exposed to books that deal with homosexuality because it promotes a lifestyle which goes against community values. I suppose they’re trying to ban books on communism, feminism and Islam too. It is one thing to think Disney is secretly brainwashing your kids, but to think academic texts about gay people are somehow going to turn you away from your girl-liking, beer-drinking straight ways shows the most ignorant understanding of how sexuality works I have ever heard of. Sometimes it hurts my brain just to try and figure out how these people think they make any sense. Surely if the people making the laws could go to college and manage to come out the other end ungay, the rest of the students in the state can be trusted to do the same? Not that I’m complaining: the world could do with a few more of us.
The Archbishop of New York Timothy Dolan told NBC that he thinks gay marriage causes society and culture to suffer, although he didn’t say exactly how or why. “[Marriage] is also the building block of society and culture. So it belongs to culture. And if we water down that sacred meaning of marriage in any way, I worry that not only the Church would suffer, I worry that culture and society would,” he reportedly said. I find it funny how these kind of vague, all-encompassing statements are never accompanied with specific examples to back them up. Homosexuality is the great evil threat that will somehow destroy the fabric of society, but it hasn’t yet, and no one is sure how it’s going to manage it, but beware all ye who tread on this earth for it most surely will. The Archbishop was responding to a statement made by Pope Francis in an interview a few weeks ago, where he very obliquely hinted that the Church might have to start dealing with the practical realities of civil partnerships in a non-discriminatory way. Amen.