Royally Sick?

Afshan Lodhi

Afshan Lodhi, born in Dubai, is of Indian/Pakistani descent. She writes plays, short fiction and works in publishing and theatre. She has worked with Manchester Lit Festival, Contact, The Royal Exchange Theatre, Eclipse Theatre and one day hopes to take over the world.

Featured image: Waxwork Prince William & Kate Middleton at Madam Tussaud’s by Prayitno, on Flickr

All the newspapers this week have been talking about it, all the gossip columns are twittering about it, everyone seems to be happy again. No it’s not a new sex-tape scandal, it’s the royal sperm!

On Monday afternoon St James’s Palace announced that the Duchess of Cambridge, i.e. Kate Middleton is expecting the royal couple’s first child. The news came after the Duchess spent a short time in hospital due to acute morning sickness. It seems the couple wanted to keep everything hush hush until Catherine’s 12 week scan but with her being admitted into hospital with the rare condition, they figured the news would leak anyway.

The whole media world seems to be abuzz, with some papers even starting to place bets as to what they will call the child. Who will be the third in line to the throne? There are even a few pictures floating around of how the couple’s child will look. Drawn up by a few forensic artists, most of them show a very pretty little child, but there are a few that show a rather scary child who seems to have gone more on William than Kate, with cold eyes, prominent ears and hardly any hair. I guess we’ll have to wait for another 9 months to see what the future heir to the throne looks like.

As David Cameron puts it ‘It is absolutely wonderful news and I am delighted for them. I am sure they will make absolutely brilliant parents and I am sure everyone around the country will be celebrating with them.’

I can tell you someone who wont be too happy with the news. With the new baby on its way, Prince Harry will be bumped down to fourth in succession to the throne. Poor Harry.
Well, congratulations to the Royal couple.

Does this mean that we get another excuse for a party?

I did hear that she could be having twins… does this mean two parties?