The Good, The Bad And The Geordie

Frazer Lough

A 19 year old Linguistics student, hailing from the great city of Newcastle. Technically a Geordie, definitely Northern.

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Over the years the Geordie accent and our antics have become increasingly attractive to the media. Through Geordie Shore the country is given a view into the apparent lifestyle of people in Newcastle intent on living it up. However, it has to be said that some of the rumours simply aren’t true. First let me point out one major thing, a Geordie is someone from Newcastle, not Sunderland, Middlesbrough or anywhere else in the North East and we do not all sound the same. So, let’s do some Geordie mythbusting!

Geordies don’t wear coats

A lot of people seem to think that Geordies are impervious to the cold. I mean we’ve all seen the images of women walking around in next to nothing. This has a great deal of truth to it as I myself only own jackets. During the winter it can get pretty chilly this far North so at times it is necessary to don a thicker coat, but this is in very rare circumstances. Yes we will wear a coat and wellies in the snow, but that is usually the only time. When it comes to a night out in Newcastle a coat is never worn. If you wear a coat on a night out prepare to be judged and it will be very clear to every Geordie in the nightclub that you aren’t one of us!

It just makes sense. A coat can ruin the outfit you are wearing quite easily. Who has the time and money to buy a coat that goes with every outfit, certainly no Geordies I know. Not wearing a coat on a night out also means we get to avoid queuing for the cloakroom, ain’t nobody got time for that. And while it may be sub-zero temperatures whilst we drunkenly wait for taxis, we’ve normally had far too much to drink to even care about the onset of pneumonia.

We speak another language

This one isn’t true. It may sound like we are talking in complete gibberish sometimes, but we are actually talking in English. Although admittedly, with an accent that uses a lot of slang it may not always be that clear to some people what we are actually saying. For those of you ever planning on venturing this far North here are a few pointers:

– Canny. This can come with various meanings. Sometimes it can mean quite or very but other times it can mean good. So something could be canny good but you could also say quite canny.

– Wey aye man. This is just a general term of agreement. Possibly the easiest Geordie phrase to grasp.

– Gan doon toon. This is a common phrase in Newcastle which translates to ‘I’m going down town/ into town’.

– I cannit be chewed. This translates to I can’t be bothered.

– This isn’t necessarily slang but it’s ‘cook book’ in Newcastle not ‘cuck buck’, as well as ‘bath’ and ‘grass’ not ‘barth’ and ‘grarse’.

Geordies are all friendly

In some ways this is true and in others it isn’t. When given alcohol the kindness can disappear a little, but in general people in Newcastle are a friendly bunch. Apologies will be given even if you walked into them as well as if they walked into you. We may seem like a rough bunch up here but we will accept many people as one of our own. And even though alcohol can get rid of some people’s friendliness it can greatly increase others’.

In a similar vein, a lot of people seem to think Geordie woman are ones to avoid at times. Yes they can sometimes be caked in fake tan and seem a bit harsh, but they are just like many other girls around the country. They simply like to put effort into looking, what they think is, their best. They don’t always mince there words and sometimes the can get a bit angry, but that is a trait amongst most Geordies. They’re not going to glass you (glass not glarse).

We’ll sleep with anything with a pulse

I’m afraid this may be one that Geordie Shore has helped to create. It is not entirely true, or Geordie specific, as I am sure that there are people in various towns and cities across the country who enjoy a bit of promiscuity. It isn’t just isolated to Newcastle, though Geordie Shore might want you to believe we are all about the pulling on a night out. We do like a good drink and with the prices we pay for alcohol it’s no wonder that we all seem hammered all of the time. The beautiful thing about Newcastle is the use of a treble, basically 3 shots of vodka etc. and your mixer. This may seem like a bad thing that would set most health and safety klaxons off, but trust me it isn’t. Some nights of the week it is even possible to get 3 trebles for the heart warming, hangover inducing price of £5.

These are just a few myths and ideas people seem to have of us Geordies, but as explained not all of them are true. Are there anymore myths about Geordies that need busting? This is highly likely. With the current image the media likes to show of Newcastle, whether that be thousands of people chanting Alan Shearer’s name, or Gazza just having a nice drive in the countryside with some fried chicken and a fishing rod, it is no wonder these myths with a base in truth still occur.  Just remember, we aren’t all horse punching, fake tan wearing, alcohol fuelled Northerners. Some of us are as white as a sheet, myself included!

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