Transgender teen blames parents for death in Tumblr post

Sean Weaver

Sean Weaver is a blogger, writer, and reader. He is a graduate student at Kutztown University, Pa studying English. Bodies and sexualities are his expertise.He spends his time being somewhat neurotic about the clothes he wears, the books he reads, the endless papers he writes, and his next hair cut. Queer is his middle name.

As originally reported at Patheos, an Ohio teen has committed suicide after her Christian parents allegedly sent her to ‘conversion therapy’, took her out of school and made her feel increasingly isolated when she was most vulnerable. On 28 December 2014, Lelah Alcorn stepped in front of a tractor trailer on I-71 and died.

In a final letter posted to her blog, Lelah recounts why she took her life:

After a summer of having almost no friends plus the weight of having to think about college, save money for moving out, keep my grades up, go to church each week and feel like shit because everyone there is against everything I live for, I have decided I’ve had enough. I’m never going to transition successfully, even when I move out. I’m never going to be happy with the way I look or sound. I’m never going to have enough friends to satisfy me. I’m never going to have enough love to satisfy me. I’m never going to find a man who loves me. I’m never going to be happy. Either I live the rest of my life as a lonely man who wishes he were a woman or I live my life as a lonelier woman who hates herself. There’s no winning. There’s no way out. I’m sad enough already, I don’t need my life to get any worse. People say “it gets better” but that isn’t true in my case. It gets worse. Each day I get worse.

That’s the gist of it, that’s why I feel like killing myself. Sorry if that’s not a good enough reason for you, it’s good enough for me. As for my will, I want 100% of the things that I legally own to be sold and the money (plus my money in the bank) to be given to trans civil rights movements and support groups, I don’t give a shit which one. The only way I will rest in peace is if one day transgender people aren’t treated the way I was, they’re treated like humans, with valid feelings and human rights. Gender needs to be taught about in schools, the earlier the better. My death needs to mean something. My death needs to be counted in the number of transgender people who commit suicide this year. I want someone to look at that number and say “that’s fucked up” and fix it. Fix society. Please.

Goodbye,

(Leelah) Josh Alcorn

Leelah reveals that her parents forced her to meet with Christian therapists and banned her from social media, which isolated her and made her feel more neglected than before.

A note from the contributor

Everyone at Vada extends their sympathies to the friends of Leelah. Leelah, you will never be forgotten and we will work to create a better world because of your sacrifice.

Rest in peace, you beautiful soul.

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